Wow, Tomorrow is June!

Hello June! Hello Summer time! 

My, oh my, how things change in one year’s time. Last year at this time I was full force on my weight loss journey. I think I might have weighed less than I do right now, lol! Granted, I wasn’t 20 weeks pregnant, either! 

Btw! I just hit 20 weeks this past Sunday! My Lillian Joy has 19 weeks or less until her arrival 🙂 my baby bump is very prominent now and I’m up to 242 lbs. UGH! Yeah, for those of you who followef me, my lowest weight was 212.8, which i hit the week before i found out o was pregnant. That means ive gained 30 freaking lbs. 30lbs. This is what happens when you can’t and don’t eat right. This is what happens when you don’t exercise hard. 

I have no energy. I keep wondering where the heck my second trimester energy is? Hello? Body?? Did you miss the memo? The second trimester is supposed to make you feel normal again. Instead, I’m just as tired and exhausted as I was in my first trimester :/ maybe even worse. Being pregnant at 33/34 is much harder than It was being pregnant at 28/29.
Over all, all is good. I’m feeling the baby kick more often now and things seem fine. I had my anatomy scan a couple of weeks ago and everything looked great. I’m so thankful for this little miracle growing inside of me! 

But, I can’t wait to get back to weight loss! Ha! I miss my “new” old body. But, right now, it’s all about Lillian. I’ll get back there eventually!


MIA with big news

I’ve been MIA. For those of you that follow my IG, you know that that is because I’m pregnant! I’m 17 weeks along today with a baby girl! She was a huge surprise, as we thought we were one and done with our son 5 years ago!

My pregnancy had a rocky start and I was put on pelvic rest and told “no exercise” for the first trimester due to random bleeding episodes (apparently, my cervix was extra sensitive). 

I was taken off those restrictions around 11 weeks, but I had no energy to do anything but work. I gained 17lbs in my first trimester 😦 but, I havent gained anything since then! I’m hovering right around 230-232lbs. If I can stay under 240, I’ll be happy.

I haven’t been able to eat veggies or much meat protein which really messed my program up! I’m just now starting to come around to stomaching those things once again. I tried jogging on the elliptical, but found thats not going to be okay while I’m pregnant, as I cannot keep my heart rate under 140. So walking it is. I have some “walk off the weight” dvds from the last time was pregnant and plan to start doing those this week. 

Everything is different this pregnancy. I’m more exhausted, I had more morning sickness, I was sick with a sinus infection for 10 weeks, and I started showing much earlier! This pic was about a week and a half ago:

I’m super excited to get to (hopefully) Oct and meet my baby girl and then it’s back to my weight loss journey. 

I’m on baby watch starting the second week of Sept since my son came at 35 weeks. I have a uterine anomaly that causes preterm birth in many instances, however, we are taking extra precautions this time since we know about it. I’ll get steroids at 28 weeks to help mature her lungs and I’ll have weekly checkups after 30 weeks. If it looks like labor is imminent before 35 weeks, they will try to stop it. I have to have a repeat csection because of my anomaly, so they’ll be taking the baby at 39 weeks if I can keep her in until then!

Life is good. I hope it is for you, as well.



The truth is, if you want to lose weight you will – you’ll put in the effort necessary – you’ll make it a priority – you’ll tell yourself no – you’ll stop buying junk so junk isn’t convenient – you’ll research nutrition and find something else – you’ll start working out, even if it’s only 10 min – you’ll just do it and you’ll stay consistent.

On the other hand, if you ‘just want to be skinny’, but don’t really (and I mean really) want to lose weight and get healthy you’ll find and use excuses. You’ll be too tired – too sore – something will come up – you’ll blame your heredity – you’ll blame medical problem (yes, I do realize medical problems can hinder weight loss, but as long as you allow it to be an excuse it will be – no medical condition requires you to fill your body with junk food) – you’ll not have the right equipment – you won’t see results fast enough – etc – you’ll just make excuses.

Don’t make excuses.


It’s Moving Again

In December i saw 215.4lbs on the scale, which was the smallest number I have seen since 12 years old. Then, almost the whole month of January, I fought with 217-220lbs (again, yes).

I changed my macros on Monday from 40/40/20 to 30/50/20 (carbs, protein, fat) by cutting out the apple and banana I was eating and added an extra protein shake as a late night snack. 

It’s working!!! I have lost 4lbs exactly since Sunday! Sunday is my official weigh in day and I was 218.8 on sunday. Today I was 214.8!

 This isn’t a fluke because I’ve been stepping on the scale periodically through the weeks to see what the hell is going on….I’ve been between 217.8 and 220.4 for weeks

I’m still eating 1700-1800 calories a day. I’m still drinking 120 oz of water. I’m eating around 120-140 carbs a day from 1 piece of whole grain bread, lots of veggies, some beans, and oatmeal.

I’m so stoked about this! Now I just need to learn to stay off the scale so I can be excited about big numbers.

I’m also on day 6 of 3 weeks of no cheats! I wasn’t cheating horribly, still staying in my calorie range, but I just want to reign myself back in.

Well, that’s life right now!


Sometimes I Write 

Time ticks on and
Days drag by.
Hearts grow cold as
Souls weep and die.
Empty words from
Thoughtless minds.
Anger builds while
Eyes are blind.

Memories fade and
History repeats
We willingly ignore the
Lies and deceit.

Bridges are burned while
Walls are constructed.
We long to break free, but
Our freedom’s obstructed.

When will we learn?
When will we see,
That this isn’t the way
It was supposed to be?